No, Mojito is not the unmentioned 3rd sibling of Lazarus, sorry for the confusion. My inner Mary and Martha are duking it out today. I thought I should bring in distant cousin Mojito to simmer the sisters down.
Martha is bat- (poop word that starts with ‘s’) cray cray today. It’s been a week. Week and a half. Likely two weeks if I really get to counting. As I told the poor postal guy when shipping my orders today – ‘a smile’s still free, right?’ in answer to his question of how my day was going. My tongue almost cut my cheek on that one. I’m good at smiling in spite of and it helps hide the crazy – mind over matterish.
I was smiling as I recounted how I discovered today that my 2nd root canal in 2 months likely ‘didn’t take’. I was smiling when I said it took us 3 years to buy some new kitchen appliances. They were ordered 2 weeks ago, delivered a week ago this Saturday, new microwave stopped ‘waving’ on Monday, dishwasher just got installed today. It’s installed, but it doesn’t work. Looks pretty, but it doesn’t work.
I was still smiling when I told him the new microwave is coming Saturday – new dishwasher next Thursday. He laughed when I said, ‘it feels just like 1983 around here’. 2 out of 4 NEW appliances are WORKING appliances. My favorite part is that you can just breathe in the vicinity of the black stainless steel and fingerprints magically appear, visible in all degrees of lighting. FAVORITE part. Tongue has now cut my cheek – tasting blood.
I stand by my newly adopted mantra, ‘I hate new things.’ I told Seth when it was delivered – it showed up all shiny and stuff and all I wanted to do was throw rocks at it. Get the new off – break it in. I don’t like to hate, but I stand by my mantra.
Back to root canal #2 – yeah, thanks chemo. Can’t wait to see how much further down the road of bad oral health you’re going to lead me. And thanks dental Insurance. Glad we could max you out early on this year. Making it rain in dental bills (mouth filling with blood). Snarky me in spades.
Oh, and this is all atop ‘normal life’. Laundry, meal planning, shopping, working, fussing and praying interchangeably for the babies, sometimes joyful, sometimes disappointed in it all, managing others’ joy & disappointments, trying to stay head above water…wash, rinse, repeat. Sometimes wanting to run away – just for like a day or so.
Got distracted, Lucy just sat down to read over my shoulder here on the porch steps. Thought that was cute till she took her boot off to scratch her toe – her feet are STANK. So much for that train of thought.
Glad cousin Mojito is here to faithfully calm me down, reel me in…so’s the sway of the porch swing. Mary’s taking a seat here beside me. She’s been patiently waiting. She’s nudged me several times today…
First, when I was smiling rather than crying as I wanted to at the dentist. Dentist gave me that sad, pitiful, genuine sympathy look I’m too used to getting, so I just asked her simply, ‘pray for me’. She’s a believer and perked up at that, ‘Now that’s something I can do – you got it!’ Thanks Mary.
Second when the poor dishwasher installer was still here almost 3 hours later. Not in the medical or dental field, but still gave me that same sad, pitiful, genuine sympathy look at the mayhem with these appliances. I asked (hopefully) could he just put the old one back in to hold us over and he apologized saying he cut the line, not thinking it was a working appliance. I said they all worked, we just thought we’d treat ourselves after waiting so long. He went on to say, he would buy it from us if he had a space for one in his kitchen. He also said about 3 months ago his washer, dryer & microwave all went out in the same week. Said there was a ‘new baby’ at home, a now 8 month old (he lit up sweetly when talking about her) and having all those appliances go like that – he knew & surpassed my seeming ‘pain’. He also said that lil’ girl was 3 months early, something about the placenta ‘not being right’ and they luckily caught it at an appt and could induce. Me – humbled, absolutely.
As I was walking him out, I said something to the effect of ‘having faith’ and it being the sustaining thing when life’s river feels raging with no calm in sight. It felt like the only thing to say because in that moment it felt like the only thing that made sense. A good reminder that it is the only thing sometimes. Thanks again Mary.
On the back porch now – sweet spot this time of evening. The soon to be setting sun, filtering through the trees. Filtered sunlight, a favorite. All the birds are chirping. Evening songs of feeding these babies that fill the nests throughout the trees and birdhouses.
There’s one family right near me in a box on the porch. After watching with fascination the mama bird work all day to build a few weeks ago, I didn’t have the heart to ‘relocate’ all her hard work. Since then, eggs were laid, babies hatched and Mama and Daddy bird are seen often right outside the kitchen window, tending and feeding these babies till they are ready for the world.
There’s something holy in all this. I can’t put my finger on it, but I know there is. The working hard, because of and in spite of. The building, even if for just a ‘season’ of life. The hustle and the bustle. The sun still shining. The beauty in tandem, waiting to be noticed and savored, even for the moment.
I have my standing ‘date’ with the oncologist tomorrow. The looming feeling I have is that, I know it. It always is. God is faithful in letting me hurry up and get my Martha on in the build up, just to faithfully remind me that Mary’s where it’s at. Right there at my Saviour’s feet, reminding me that the moments, the beauty alongside, they are mine for the taking. I’m taking this one, thanks Mary. Cousin Mojito wasn’t too shabby either ♥
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42